Diamond couple's guide to marriage

(Originally published in Salisbury Journal, July 31 2014)

Getting soaked in a raging storm on your wedding day could dampen any marriage, but it wasn’t a bad omen for one special Tisbury couple.

Shelia Sawyer, 78, a retired secretary, and Rex Sawyer, 79, a local author and former headmaster of Wilton Middle School, will celebrate their diamond wedding anniversary on August 6.

“You’ve got to have a strong love”, Mrs. Sawyer says. “We haven’t had too many trials or tribulations fortunately.

“We respect each other enormously. He’s my biggest fan, and I’m his. It’s all just been whizz, bang, wallop.”

The pair met in London when they were 13 and married when they were just 18 and 19. Many parents might worry about their children getting married so young, but Mrs. Sawyer’s were delighted.

“They liked Rex enormously”, she says, “and they were perfectly happy with it.

“They didn’t have anything to worry about.”

Four children, Kevin, 59, Alison, 56, Paul, 54, and Sara, 48, have followed since then.

It’s all been plain sailing. They have experienced miscarriage and a near-fatal brush with meningitis, and now Mr. Sawyer faces an ongoing battle with Alzheimer’s, which has forced them to make a few adjustments.

But Mrs. Sawyer says: “We’ve had a good life and you’ve got to accept that these things happen.”

The couple haven’t shied away from arguments either. “I don’t believe in people not having an argument”, she says, “you’ve got to get it out in the open. We’ve had some blazing rows. Fight your corner and stand up for what you believe in.”

Mrs. Sawyer is concerned the current trend for mega weddings might prevent other couples from reaching the same milestone as them.

“We didn’t have a big wedding. People have got their values mixed up spending a fortune on their wedding. Don’t get into debt before you’ve even started.

“These days people expect too much too soon. You’ve got to rough it. There are two people and that is the most important thing. I have enjoyed the times when you don’t have a lot of money. Moments with the family have been the most special”